Well for some fucking reasons, I had my post for my boyfriend saved as draft.
I was so fucking pissed off or more of angry last night to even sleep. I only slept at four plus, halfway through the volleyball match of Cuba and smth. I haven't have my breakfast and lunch yet. I am still fucking angry about that shit. It was in May but fuck it. I am considering a.... I am thinking about the consequences but fuck. I am gonna go through the pain like shit but it's better than dragging it, knowing it will happen someday and all. Fuck you then, V.

Glad that J enjoyed her birthday. Well. Happy birthday again J. Gonna go over to J's, her dad catered food.

Hey Mel, I doubt you'd see this but hope you feel okay! Luv you! :)


Should I give up? I seriously don't know. Again, I'm saying this. But this time, I feel that_ and me has more than 5000miles of distance. _ seems to be very detatched(told you it was the other way round) I don't know...I feel so, helpless. I can't even turn to you, my dear. Sigh. 1 year was long but when it's your time, you have to leave. Okay. I surrender to sadness. I feel vulnerable. I can't fight it. I can only hope for the best. I only take the truth. (Why the fuck isn't he calling yet)
Sigh.

Posted @ Cc.lj, locked and only friends can view it.

No love, no 'i miss you', just a heart that died from all this shit that god gave.
Party(?) at J's, I'm turning to absolute vodka if there's any. Sigh ttm.